Mountain Man Speaks to Robynn
- July 08, 2009
- Category: Daily Diary
- (12) Comments
Robynn of the wonderful Robynn’s Ravings had a question for Mountain Man. From my survey, I know most people don’t come back to read the comments so for the benefit of all who might be having similar problems, here is Robynn’s question:
I got yeller wood and red wood. It’s ready to be installed on my floor. It’s in the guh-raj.
Here’s my question: You seem to know a lot about wood, Mountain Man. So, exactly how is it you get a feller, like say a husband, just for instance, to get that wood outta the guh-raj and onto the floor? No matter WHAT color or kind the wood is? If you can solve this problem you are TRULY a jeen-yus. Your Friend, Robynn
Mountain Man’s response:
Dear Robynn,
To get that wood out of the guh-raj and onto the floor, there is only one way. Now you might think I would say employ those feminine wiles and coerce him with your abundant charms but no, that won’t work at all. Once he is out of your dazzling presence, his mind will turn right back to sports.
Here’s the answer:
Pick up the yellow pages and head to the section on flooring contractors. Pick the one with the biggest, most obnoxious ad and then call said office and ask them out for an estimate. Have them look at the job, describe the intricacies of it in great detail and then have him present you with an estimate.
Take that estimate which will run well into the 4 figures if you’ve done your job correctly, head to your husband with a loving smile and present it to him. Have a calendar handy too with a date circled. Tell him you don’t want to do it, you really don’t but if he doesn’t get out of that chair and into the guh-raj by the specified date, you will be calling said contractor and writing him a check in order to finish the job. Never mind if you have to raid the college fund or the retirement savings. The trick here is to be serious in a friendly, loving way. Do not nag. Just put a copy of that estimate on the calendar with the days marked with a countdown to when YOU ARE MAKING THE CALL. I’d wager a guess if your man is a typical thrifty male, the thought of spending all that money will propel him into action.
And, if that fails, please contact me for a tutorial on how to install wood flooring.
Mountain Man
Sounds like a great plan Mtn Man!!
Date: July 08, 2009
That ought to get him moving. Great advice Mountain Man!
Date: July 08, 2009
And I liked the part about "his mind will turn right back to sports". Or tractors or ….
Linda
http://coloradofarmlife.wordpress.com
Date: July 08, 2009
Great advice, Mountain Man! Let's see if that makes him jump into action!
Date: July 08, 2009
Dear Mountain Man -
I thank you most kindly and can tell you should write advice columns.
Somebody told that husband I mentioned about what you said concerning installers. He replied, "YaHOO! When will they be here??!" All our investments are tied up so, he won this round of liars dice!
Now just whaddya do with a feller like that? I'm thinkin' about covering him with glue and stickin' floor boards to him. I could consider it practice for the real thing. Do you think he would look better in the red or the yeller wood?
Date: July 08, 2009
This is great advice! It also works well for landscaping projects:)
Date: July 08, 2009
And that is coming from a guy?? I thought that was the double-secret plan that only women knew!
Date: July 09, 2009
Oh Mountain Man – what great advice! Love it.
Date: July 09, 2009
Smart man! Great advice with a little bit of humor thrown in.
Date: July 09, 2009
Hi All.
Linda, yes, tractors and big equipment are a distraction here as well.
Lin, yes it came straight from MM although I wrote it. I posed the question while his mind was still fuzzy from lack of caffeine and that's what he suggested.
And for Robynn, MM doesn't know what to say except to ship him out here to spend a day on his work crew and we'll whip him into shape.
As to color choices, I suggest you use both and create yellow and red stripes.
Thanks all for taking the time to leave a comment.
Date: July 09, 2009
I love Mountain Man's answer…what a smart feller! I'm going to have to try that with a few projects around here.
Date: July 09, 2009
That is too funny! I could have used that in the past, but now I'm blessed to have a darling "can fix or build just about anything" English husband. I loved this post and hope MM will become a regular voice of advice on subjects within areas of his expertise.
Date: July 11, 2009